That time of the year again

It's the last week of 2010 and the office is literally empty. There's only 5 of us in today. My email inbox hasn't been blinking with new msgs for the last hour and phone's pretty quiet too. So glad for the much needed silence in the office after the much chaotic past few weeks.

As it has always been with the past year ends, it is time to reflect on the happenings of the year. I think i've pretty much had a good year, with its fair share of bumps and bruises along the way. Career-wise, I believe I'm on the right track though I know I still have quite hurdle in getting the lady-Boss' confidence in my abilities. Imran, believe it or not, sorta opened the door for me straight into her good books! He charmed the tudungs off of her during our company outing last weekend!It was really strange seeing Imran chit-chatting away with her, as if she's Tokmi to him. So till today, she's always talking about how cute and sociable my son is, to our colleagues and work friends :) Yeay Imran!

Life at home has been pretty good too. I can't really complain though I know we can improve on a lot of things. No thanks to my little fender-bender last month, all the savings for the new fridge and washing machine is now rerouted to pay the workshop. Despite that, we did manage to squeeze in an awesome Europe holiday and family vacays with the kids so I guess it's not so bad after all.

Will start bulding up the kitty again next year for our upcoming (mis)adventures. Oh yeah, and a new phone. And digital camera. And a Moroccan holiday :P

The best things in life

Blogging away from home tonite. Arrived in Kerteh this lovely Sunday morning for a meeting tomorrow..and feeling depressed and homesick as hell becoz of that! No doubt the hotel is nice and the beach is gorgeous. But looking out the window at the kids splashing in the pool made me ache thinking of my children back home. Can't wait to take them away for another "almost beach holiday" this coming weekend!

Anyway, talking about kids, a coupla people i know popped their own babies this past few weeks.. one worth mentioning is my sister, who gave birth to their third last week. The most cute little babygirl ever..besides mine of course. Kinda surreal watching her bathe and change the little bub..her last baby happened like 8yrs ago! She totally forgot how to breastfeed n stuff but good thing is that my mum's around n her baby is quite easy to handle. like most babygirls i know :)

We've been doing a lot of things with the kids lately and i'm so enjoying the time just hanging out with them and talking about anything and everything. Mia is learning really fast and she can recite the numbers 1 through 10 and sing her favourite song "Twinkle2 Little Star" pretty well! I always forget that she's only 1 and a half..But she's still so painfully shy among strangers. She avoids eye-contact with anyone she doesn't know and if she can't hide behind me or anything else, she will just close her eyes!!

Imran's quite a good big brother too..although sometimes he does get a little rough with his babysis. U can talk about anything with Imran nowadays, he's such a good conversationalist! Today I told him that he can't go to Tokmi's house tomorrow coz Tokmi's not feeling well, so he asked me, "Oooohh..that's why I can't go to Tokmi's house.. Tokmi got flu?? oooo..Tokmi dah makan her medicine?It's ok mummy, I will stay home and watch Kuzco with Mia" His tone is full of concern, so endearing.

I'm thankful to have this two little angels around me and I really don't know if I can feel any happier than I am now.

Quarantined!

My kids and I are under house arrest as we are all infected with HFMD..ugh, as much as I love not having to go to work all week, it's kinda annoying coz there's not much else I can do at home, besides watch TV, go on facebook and goof about with the kids. i'm pretty sure we got it from one of our relatives whose kids had it few weeks ago. daym..never really thought we would end up getting the disease. imran recovered pretty quickly but the little girl had it worse. the ulcers keep popping up under her 'langit-langit' and she had a tough time trying to eat or drink. it hurst even when she's tring to soothe herself to sleep. nothing works. which means me n the dad haven't been getting much sleep as she was fretful and cried most of the night. But yesterday she was lil bit better and today she's almost back to her usual cheeky self. she won't let me check or put bonjela on it so im just guessing that they must have healed. am switching her milk to pediasure again just to get her appetite going again.

The doctor advised to get our bodies loaded up on Vitamin C and lots of water so have been giving the kids bottles n bottles of juices. The spots on our feet are still there but i didn't see any new ones coming up so i hope we're on our way out of this. Hopefully we'll be ok by the weekend. I need to get better too coz i just can't afford to miss Jasmin's wedding reception again!!

Just venting out

I can’t believe we are approaching yet another December with all the celebrations..time for kindy concerts, school holidays and the rush to clear up work for the financial year followed by clearing of all the remaining annual leaves. Not that my life has been exciting or anything but even with the normalcy of our day-to-day routine , I still feel a little overwhelmed that I have lots to accomplish before I say goodbye to 2010. For instance, the gym subscription which I’ve kept on postponing due to whatever reasons..the neglected garden that’s looking more and more rainforest-like by the day..banking in the kids’ duit Raya..updating our insurance portfolio to include Mia..sending our clothes to the donation center..the list goes on. Note that most if not everythg on the list requires a sum of money to kick-off which is perhaps the main factor these have been pushed to the backburner for now. Despite the pay increase, I’m still finding it tough to keep up with our expenses.. seems like there is always something happening that needs major attention / fixing / replacement. Last month it was the TV, the coming month’s pay will be for a new washing machine and the month after that would have to be the fridge. Hrmphh.. I know I shouldn’t be complaining coz this money problem is a never ending miserable cycle. Even with the yearly pay raises and bonuses, somehow it will almost always be followed with issues that requires huge amounts of money and plops me back to square zero again.

Ok talking about this is making me even more depressed. I know things do have their way to work their own way out and all. it’s just that I wish for once, money can be struck out of my list of problems :P

New chapter

Yesterday was my first day at Level 55. Fresh out of bootcamp, brain all washed and shiny :P The day went by so fast, with meetings filling up half of it and the rest just with getting the computer and network stuff up and working and getting to know my new colleagues and the office. All in all, it was a good first day. Met with the GM boss-lady and was kinda taken aback with her remarks about working with females. She mentioned that female staff always tend to give her problems and thus do not last long in her dept. Like, wtf? Anyway, i'm just gonna take that in stride and just go with the flow.

My workscope is nothing different that what i've done before, just that this time it's only confined to the O&G business. Something i would need to master as quickly as possible. My boss and SM are cool fellas. The type yg pijak semut pun tak mati. But they are also sharp and very2 intelligent. So I really2 have to learn the business inside out fast to keep up with them.

Thought of going in today to just familiarize myself with the work but was discouraged by the boss-lady as it "gives an impression that you are not managing your time well". i mean, seriously?? when half the time i will be traveling, u can't expect me to be up to date with the paperwork due unless i come in on some saturdays. haiyah..maybe that's why they give me a laptop instead of a desktop. so i can work from anywhere. but ive always thought that the best time to get work done is on a weekend, when the office is quiet and the phones ain't ringing.

Anyway it is saturday today and i will heed her advice and spend quality time owed to my munchkins for going away for 2 weeks. The boss is always right, right?!

My life as a tai-tai

I'm on a short break before starting at the new job. Was so looking forward to the tai-tai week ahead but now that it's here, wow, tai-tai-ing is not as leisurely as I thought it would be! Am practically up and about by 7:30am making sure Imran's up and showered, screaming at the maid to wake up and prepare the kids' milk and giving Mia her bath before sending off Imran to school. Well Iskandar still drives him there but I make it a point to at least send him to the car, put the seatbelt on and flykiss him off. Then it's back to the laundry, playing with Mia, chasing after the kid until about 10:30am when I tuck her in for her nap. A quick shower, FB and some news updates later and I'm off to fetch Imran from school. Make the boy's lunch and drive to LB for a lunch date myself with Iskandar. After lunch is a dash to Jalan TAR to buy some material, the tailor for J's bridesmaid baju, a bit of grocery shopping before its time to head home n prepare dinner. phew! no leisure whatsoever! But it's all good and i'm loving every second of being around my kids the whole day. Something I would truly miss for about 2 weeks when I hv to go for the P bootcamp on Friday :P

Yesterday managed to squeeze in a quick catch-up over drinks with my girls J, N and H. Oh well, not really quick as we end up leaving the restaurant way past 10pm! But it was fun as always with the girls..Aside from my family, I can't imagine my life without my girls :) xoxo! Here's to growing old together, bitchy as ever! :D

I can't wait for my gaji to come in coz I hv like a million things to do before Friday and there's just no more time! No choice but to get an IOU from Iskandar to start me off with the tailoring and bootcamp stuff. So annoying. They promised it'll be in on Monday but it's already Tuesday and nada!

Ok, gotta go, it's time for Mia's milk and nap..this tai-tai's me-time is o.v.e.r!

The return of Syawal

Once again, Syawal returns..and this year i am celebrating with many-many more blessings than the years before. Syukur alhamdulillah. I'm so excited to wake up to the smell of my morning coffee and butterfly kisses from my two little angels, to seeking forgiveness from my husband and parents, to the sounds of kids screaming and laughing and coming again and again for rounds of duit raya..to the beautiful spread of Raya goodies prepared by Mummy and all the ladies of the family and catching up with relatives and friends, old and new amidst mouthfuls of ketupat, rendang, spicy gulai tempoyak, lontong and all sorts of cookies and sweets.

This year, I will be preparing simple Soto Johor for Raya brunch with my inlaws before heading to my parents'. Of course, the mandatory ketupat, lemang and rendang will be part of the menu too. standard stuff, but then again my in-laws are not really big in eating so yeah, lucky me :)

This Ramadhan we have been busy doing up the house a little bit..filling up the empty walls with paintings and pictures that we got many many months back but never had the time to properly frame up..replacing the old flower arrangements with new ones and throwing out a bunch of stuff we don't use anymore. Also took time to sort out our wardrobe and donate those that don't fit (me) anymore. One thing good about Ramadhan is that I get to spend more time at home doing all this spring cleaning stuff. Which also means more space in the wardrobe for new stuff! :D

Thank god for all that lunch money saved, we have enough to get each of us two new pairs of baju kurungs and baju melayus..a new pair of shoes and songkok for imran. i can't wait to dress the kids up on Raya morning, they're gonna look super duper cute, in their little baju melayu and baju kurung, i bet!

Tomorrow is the last day of Ramadhan and the city is already deserted :) am looking forward to the smooth drive home and quiet KL at least for another week or so.. which is also a good thing coz i can pack up my stuff at my workplace and move as much things as i possibly can when people are not around..in time for my resignation on Sept 24th.

A blessed Syawal indeed..:)

Another big decision

Again I am presented with a tough..tough decision to make. Why things have to change just as I am nicely fitting in with the not-so-new "family", I have no idea..perhaps god really has a plan for me. Change is good, and yes opportunities like this will never come around twice but I do not expect this supposedly no brainer type situation would put me in such confusion and sadness. Everyone I confided in says I'm nuts if I don't seize this chance and my family especially thinks this means a better future for me n the kids. I guess there really is no decision to be made then.

But..how do I say goodbye to this other family of mine?? The people who have accepted me so graciously and share their jokes and troubles and home-cooked food with..

Time is running out and I really do need to break the news soon. I just need to figure out how...Gosh i wish I can have a "flash forward" and see what's it gonna be like in my future! Nervous!!

Stuck

Iskandar's left for Delhi for the week so the kids n i are dumping ourselves at Mummy's house. this was expected to be a great arrangement as i hardly hv time these days for chit-chatting with my mum. BUT..to my annoyance, my mum's house is booked by a production house to shoot some lame-ass Malay drama. AGAIN. for those who know me, would know that my mum's house has been a pretty common scene in so many cerekaramas. Even some videoclips, Chinese, Tamil and Filipino soap operas too. Guess that makes it pretty cool but after the hundredth drama, i'm so over the excitement of seeing celebrities do their thing in front of the camera. and right at this moment, they are shooting a scene in the living room where i think the female actor is suppose to naik hantu and get into a huge screaming fight worse than kimora with her cheating husband or something. she's so effing loud and it's really pissing me off as my kids are trying to sleep up here! Mia was startled so many times and screamed at each take. worse still, i didn't even get to see my mum as we are all trapped in our rooms as long as they are shooting. AND we have to keep the TV down too. SO SO SOOOO annoying.

im still awake coz i'm waiting for Iskandar to get online. haven't heard from him all day and am getting a little worried. sambil2 tu i'm browsing for tips for my Strategic Interview happening on friday. reading others' experiences about it, i'm getting even more freaked out!

am feeling a little hungry but can't get to the fridge downstairs for obvious reasons.. urrrgggghhh..wish i'm back home now!!

Mia is 1!

And how so very proud i am of her!Her walking's more stable now and she can even walk backwards a few steps! her giggles and laughs are supercute and infectious, just can't get enough of that toothy grin and cheeky smile. She's so precious to me and i hate leaving her every morning to go to work..can't believe she's already a year old.

Last night we got our families together for a small birthday party for the girl. i managed to order all the party stuff online and iskandar put up the baby pink balloons and banner saturday morning. for her cake, i ordered birthday cupcakes from +wondermilk which are just heavenly things and were too pretty to eat! the kids had a great time with the cousins.. we were worried that there would be more adults than kids but we had to keep the crowd small due to the space constraint.. but the kids, though outnumbered, definitely had more fun than i'd seen them last! they were all over the place (and each other!), we had to break up several kiddie fights too! so cute! got mia dressed up in the prettiest dress, fit for the prettiest 1 year old in the world :) she was so well behaved and laughed and giggled her way all through the night.

For my baby Mia Aleena Putri, Mummy's so so proud of you, you are and always will be my little angel.. always know that Mummy is here for you no matter what. there's nothing i could wish more than for you to have the best in life. you and your brother are my breath, my reason to live. love you to bits, little angel..Happy Birthday.

Jalan-jalan post

I've been carefully planning a 10-day holiday for my family since December and finally it happened at the end of May! Yes i know this post is way over due but it would be a huge loss if i don't write about the whole experience with photos to proof! afterall, i was the one who did all the crazy planning work!! Yup it was crazy, looking for flights, hotels that suit the budget, cheap cabbies, checking the forex every single day.. esp. when ure organizing for a big group! But i must say that the trip was PERFECT..

Our first destination was Dublin where we stayed with my youngest sister. It's a nice city but nothing much to do except exploring the shops and parks. its a very windy city and the nights were chilly!

Barcelona was just magical..can't get enough of the unbelievable, puzzling Gaudi architecture. The Spanish guitarists busking on the streets were just as i imagined it..talented, handsome young men! shopping was awesome with Zara's and Mangos at every corner..prices are dirt cheap and there's an outlet too!! And the tapas bars along La Rambla were perfect to spend the hours just people-watching.Bliss... promised ourselves to return with the kids once the piggy's replenished..hopefully one day.

London was same ol busy, bustling London..which was lovely with the perfect sunny summer weather. It seems like all of London are on holiday too, judging by the huge crowds at Covent Garden, Trafalgar Sq. etc. The beautiful weather is just too nice to miss out on i suppose. Of course, it had to rain non-stop day in day out on one of the days we were there..but that was only for a day and the rest of the time was simply perfect.

Of course we missed the children like crazy while we're away..and of course they didn't miss us at all! :P everytime we called home to talk with them they're always too busy playing, sleeping etc..sigh.

And of course what's a big family vacation without a bit of drama? hehehe.. Iskandar almost missed the whole trip due to dengue! my sister and her many hissy fits, the lost shopping bags, and we almost missed our flight home coz we left one of our luggage at our hotel!!

After so long

of not updating this blog i really dont know where to start!! a lot has been happening past few weeks, it's been one helluva crazy roller coaster ride that i'm still on! but it's all good, tiring as hell but good. work's been taking me around from bangkok to ipoh to jb to singapore and soon another roadshow will start. most likely the east coast next week. i still haven't unpacked my little trolleybag can u believe it.

Both the kiddies have been up and down with the cough and cold..my poor babies. imran's missed school this whole week, just to make sure he's cleared of the cough completely. just can't think of what parent sends their sick kids to school only to infect the other kiddies!! damn you, irresponsible, sorry excuse of a parent! Mia's even more kesian, the coughing's disturbing her sleep..i do hope she gets better soon. breaks my heart to hear her coughing way into the night..

Oh, Mia's started to take her first steps!!! i just can't believe how fast he's progressing in her motor skills. she started standing about a month ago n if she's distracted with a toy while standing up, she will take little steps without even realizing it. but when she does, i think she sorta freaks out a bit with the movement and sits down again. it's soooo cute to watch..

Tonite is Saturday nite and i'm all alone with the kids..and maids...n Kat :P. Well only iskandar is away. aaaanyways, i'm just gonna have a quiet nite in with my Lovely Bones. i've read halfway and it's such a page turner but i just had to stop at about 3am while i was in bangkok or risk missing my important meeting the next day!

So..hopefully it won't be too long before my next update again..good nite..

New career

Started my new job after about a week plus of tai-tai-ing and work's been on fifth gear ever since! and here i thought that my first week working at a GLC would be easy-breezy-goyang -kaki :P and for the first time in a long time i don't find myself checking the clock every other half hour as i was always having my hands and head full with paperwork to do, client portfolios to study and meetings to attend. and it's such a great feeling, to be part of a young, energetic team again. it's only my first week and i've already started leaving office at like 7pm - 8pm! it's not good i know, i should learn to manage my work better (and my boss) and try to get home before the kids' bedtime. imran's already showing separation anxiety symptoms when he insists i go to bed with him and says things like "Mummy, no need to go work ok" or "Mummy, sleep with imran ok, jom" with that big eyes and adorable pleading voice.

My teammates are a friendly bunch of jokers. i could see that my boss has done a good job in putting together a great team. they tell me about those crazy times they had to stay overnite at office due to tender submission, constant travelling, etc. but they did give me the impression that it's all good and not a burden at all coz the work is exciting and my boss gives everyone equal opportunity to learn and lead the team for each and every project. i love that they've been genuinely helpful and friendly to me, despite my blurness, being new. i hope to catch up with them soon.

Wishing myself all the best of luck for the next week - it's gonna be another crazy one! Nite-nite!

Soulmates schmoulmates

A friend recently asked me whether i think Iskandar is my soulmate, and that kinda caught me offguard a bit. Don't get me wrong, I love him to bits but we do have our differences. Like a LOT. for example, he's into TV shows like Lost and rock music and PS3, while i'm more a Channel E person and r&b and i just can't stand Lost. he's a scruffy messy guy and i'm a neat-freak Monica. he's a movie buff while i always fall asleep halfway. Honestly, I don't think we have much in common but we do come together in the important stuff, like the kids, money and stuff. and he has my back whenever i need him, my shoulder to cry on, a listening ear without judging. i don't feel the need to be around him 24 hours a day, we're quite fine being on our own sometimes.

I define soulmates as people who are totally into each other, think alike and have everything in common. i'm trying hard to not sound cynical but i think anyone who wants to get in your pants can be (or pretend to be) your soulmate. the kind of intense attraction, physical and emotional that gets you on a high usually fizzles at the first sign of boy-girl commitment, let alone marriage. But that's where the fun truly is, discovering the quirks and unsavoury habits and learn to be patient and adapt to the reality coz love is much more than that.

So i guess the above kinda answers the question, no, i don't think Iskandar is my soulmate. He is my lover, a reliable husband and father and my best friend, all rolled into one scruffy, bald mess. and i love him to bits for that.

Lazy hazy Wednesday

Good morning! And what a cool morning it is today, a lovely break after the many days of scorching hot sunny ones. Most of us would still be at home or kampung, extending the long CNY break through the weekend. Like my hubby who i suspect should still be on his PS3, still in his PJs, tak gosok gigi and all at this time. I'm so jealous. But it's ok, I'll have my long break coming next week, yeay!

Anyway, the weekend had been a good one for us. Saturday nite with the girls, a bit of gardening and on Sunday Iskandar took me out for a Valentine's dinner date at my favourite restaurant, Cafe Cafe. I must admit I slacked BIG time this year, I didn't get him anything, not even a card!!! I thought with all the big spendings this past few weeks, it would be sorta understood that Valentine's would be very2 low-key, or nothing at all. And then he came and surprised me with the most beautiful Thomas Sabo charm bracelet...sigh. Felt so bad for not getting him anything! I know he's been looking at Blackberries and I'm looking to get him one for his birthday. So i hope that makes up for my slack.

Yesterday had both sets of grandparents over for dinner. I whipped up a fab (haha) dinner of ayam rempah, red snapper broth, sambal kentang, veggies and a side of sambal belacan and cili padi. Yums! Dah le had Thurkah's banana leaf rice for lunch, mentekedarah lagi that nite :P Really2 need to detox before yet another pig out session at Hood's this weekend!

So here i am this morning, at my desk, trying so hard to concentrate on work but my mind is at home, my tummy is bloated and my eyes can't look at anything else but the gorgeous charm bracelet wrapped around my wrist :) Cepatla 5:30!!

Mia's scare

Past 3 days had been so terrifying for me as Mia was admitted for high fever and fits. Yes, fits! She developed a high temperature fever on Tuesday afternoon which got worse that night. Iskandar was in Brunei for the big move so the kids and I stayed at Mum's for a few days. At about 7:00am on Wednesday morning, I had just fed her some milk and she was just dozing off when she suddenly jolted and screamed. As I carried her to comfort her, her eyes suddenly rolled upwards and she started to clench her fists in a seizure! In a panic, I ran all over the house looking for my parents with her in my arms, still seizing..it was the most horrifying 30seconds of my life. I had no clue what to do, I just blanked, helpless as I held her tightly hoping she would stop seizing.

After about 30 seconds, she went still, but her eyes were still rolled upwards. Mum appeared out of nowhere and immediately grabbed a wet towel to wrap around her. I heard my parents scolding me for not toweling her through the night but I couldn't really respond coz I was madly terrified about losing her. She looks so weak and helpless. She just stared blankly into space even I was calling her name loudly and pinching her cheeks. She stayed that way until we arrived at the hospital. Then only she would respond by looking at me when I called her name. That was when I felt so so relieved, that she'd came back to me.

I didn't tell Iskandar at first as I know he's going through a lot of stress with the moving, and I didn't want him to feel helpless in the situation. And also coz I was scared to death that he would blame me for not looking after her properly. But I had to tell him when her paed said that she needs to be admitted. He panicked of course, but I'm so glad that he didn't blame me. We both didn't know about these things, never having experienced it with Imran.

Mum followed me to the hospital, she then told me that I used to have fits when I was about Mia's age too. In fact, I was the only one among my siblings to have it. Like me, my mum panicked when I had it the first time, and straightaway put me under a cold shower. Later at the paed's clinic, I found out that the condition is hereditary, and unfortunately I had passed the condition to Mia, the poor thing.

Mia's feeling better today. She has a viral infection which caused the high temp and fits. Today her temp reading is between 36-37 but she's still not yet out of the woods. It'll be at least a week of antibiotics until she can fully recover.

I couldn't believe myself for taking her fever for granted. Thing is, we were due to return on home that Wednesday anyway so I thought I still had time to properly feed her meds and monitor her temp when we go home as all our meds and kits were at home. But of course I was too late, her temp read 39.6 by the time we reached the hospital. She could have reached 40 when we were at home, which probly triggered the fits.

I swear I won't let it happen again. I have all the knowledge (I hope) and medical supplies with me, in case she develops another fever. I pray and hope that I don't ever have to use them at all.

Hopes for the new year

Aside from the blessings of our new baby girl in June, I would say that 2009 had been quite a year of challenges, marred by losses of loved ones, and changes in the office scene which saw us butting heads with the new management and parting ways with our beloved colleagues.

Come December, I was ready to throw in the towel and was pleasantly surprised when another career opportunity came a-knockin' at the right time! I turned them down last year when they offered, as I was so happy and contented with where I was then, but given the sudden twist of events, also taking that it's been 5 plus years that I've been doing the same stuff, I figured what better time to escape the "madness" and join the other side of the fence. So, after much thought and tete-a-tete sessions with my ex-bosses and colleagues, I've finally put in my resignation on the 31st of December. Couldn't think of any better day to quit then the last day of the year!

Mixed feelings, of course, I can't help but feel a little sentimental bout leaving this second home of mine, esp. those colleagues whom I've grown to know and love after 5 long years. But I guess I have to move on, for my own good and for the company's good, as I've been unhappy here for quite sometime with all this changes and politics of the new management. I'm starting to slack a lot more too, my production was terrible, didn't reach my target for the first time ever, and I didn't give a shit! So I really should move on.

New year means new resolutions, yeah old news but this year Iskandar and I resolve to spend more "grown-up time", just the two of us, without the kiddies. As much as I wish there's more waking hours in a day to be with my babies, we do need to take care of our relationship too. So, Iskandar will be in charge of our social diary (chewah!) while I'll plan our couple's getaways. Let's just hope this won't be another warm-warm-chicken-shit talk :)